I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Come see our sink grown plant.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
