Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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