isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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