if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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