I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
