We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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