I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
