nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
