she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
In America we eat man semen.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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