A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
