bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Randomize
