don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
