I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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