How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
