u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
don't judge my taste in strippers
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize
