i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
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