oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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