can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
