i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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