I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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