So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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