i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
