i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize