He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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