It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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