Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
