I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
