Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
