never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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