is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize