oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize