I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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