i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
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