: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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