I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
