i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Randomize
