some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize
