There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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