When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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