My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
