I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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