Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize