Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
do herpes really smell.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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