I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
