Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
