It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
sex in a hospital.. check
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
