you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
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