its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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