Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize