This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
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